Getting along with others

Getting Along with Others
By: Lone Heron
Author of Inherited Rage-available at amazon.com

Getting along with others seems to be a real challenge for many, including myself.. I like the ideal of getting along with others but it doesn’t always seem to work out to well. I say that because if you aren’t agreeing with them,you probably aren’t going to get along with them. You can try, but likely you will keep getting hung up on that same old disagreeable snag. Or at least that seems to have been my personal experience. I can agree to disagree, but I seem to have difficulty sitting silently by and keeping my mouth shut! It’s really quite ironic when you consider I spent the first twenty years of my life keeping my mouth shut -fear is a powerful motivator – i guess II have made up for it the last twenty years of my life and now I find myself reverting back to being a quieter, less volunteering person- what’s the point when no one hears or remembers?

What’s the point of asking when the people you have asked have proven time and again they don’t really care about what’s up with you because their drama is soooooo much more important…
We all have people like this in our lives and even when we take time out to focus and try to help them, they don’t really appreciate it. They take everything you have to give and then want more but they don’t want to reciprocate anything to feed the flow of energy. Oh no- to get these people to do anything to help you is about as difficult as freezing water in hell.

You can ask nicely, bargain, offer a fair trade, beg, cajole, pester, annoy and they just smile agree and then ignore- or pretend the conversation never occurred. But these hese same people won’t blink an eye in hesitation the next time they see you before they launch into what they need from you. These people are I have decided evil and insincere friends. Sincere friends want to help. They offer their help and actually follow through instead of just talking about it.

I think the time has come to weed my garden of insincere friends- those who will take my help all day long- those who feel no qualms to ask of me whatever they like with no thought of reciprocation- it reminds me of what the nazis did to the Jewish, and of what a parricide parent does to create a parricide child.

The give and take energy is out of balance- take take take- more more more- it’s all over the place in our society and until we learn how to draw hard boundaries it will continue to be picked up by group after group to try and succeed where prior groups have failed- the trail will be followed by many until enough realize and consciously divert the heard by drawing boundaries and choosing how they engage,instead of wasting energy helping others who do not reciprocate and who do not reinvest the energy wisely given them by those who helped them. ” Waste not, want not ” – ageless wisdom. Yet so many of us seem to forget this, we waste and squander and then look for someone else to refill the proverbial gas tank. The proverbial gas tank is filled when others pay attention to us. The quality of attention could be comparable to the quality of fuel in your vehicle.
If the gas has been contaminated your car won’t run as smoothly. If the person listening to you can’t tell you what you said 5 min after your conversation was over because they interrupted to tell you something about a totally different subject – well all the energy you spent on that particular conversation was wasted. And without reciprocal energy investment you end up feeling drained and empty. It’s just part of the cycle of life- checks and balances that need to occur in order to maintain harmony- makes since when you apply it to your checking account – but many never apply that thought to their time. If more considered it I bet I could get along with those people a whole lot better.

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Survival

Survival- this picture says it all!

patience

Wandervogel Diary

My kids have been absolutely wonderful to me since I had this stroke. I have talked with Henry every week. Paco has called repeatedly. I spoke with Sarah three times today–she is driving her daughter to Disney World. I don’t think I would have gotten through this thing in one piece were it not for my kids.

My friends have been wonderful, too. Dusty has called to check in on me. Paul called me the day after he returned from Brazil. Lone Heron has called almost every week.

Lone Heron–a pseudonym–I have learned so much from her and her experience as a parricide growing up. I have learned so much from her book Inherited Rage. I have concluded that parricides are a breed apart, situationally defined, no danger to me nor to society, and that our best bet is to convince a prosecutor that the “typical” parricide should not be…

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Learning How to Feel

Learning how to feel
By: lone Heron
Author of Inherited Rage -available at amazon.com

Learning how to communicate requires learning how to listen.

Learning how to truly listen
Requires learning how to feel.
How many can truly honestly say how they feel?
How do you feel today?

If you don’t feel good are you ignoring it just to get through the day? That’s what happens to children of parricide. They have to ignore their feelings just to survive. After years of this practice they become numb just like after listening to loud noises over time causes one to lose hearing. Ignoring how we feel causes a lack of feelings. Most of us have a choice but the child of parricide has no more of a choice about his feelings than the soldier who fights with heavy artillery has a choice about his hearing- even ear protection will not completely protect from the damage being done.

When we don’t have the compassion or the feeling to lift a finger to aide another in assistance when they are asking for it what gives us the right to judge them after they take care of the problem themselves? A good majority of our good Christian citizens who tell us we shouldn’t judge will be the first ones to turn on the evening news and make decisions they lack the information to honestly make. Looks like Judgement in my mind. The very Christians that turned a blind eye unwilling to help were the same damn busy bodies that visited me in jail wanting to help- but then it was tooooooo late. God will save you they said- to which I think if god worked those good Christians would have intervened but they did not because they only quoted what the bible said about God- that same program they were taught did not work at my house. They could not conceive much less understand and so they judged and to this day many still do. It is a very sad situation, ignorance and fear breed segregation that is based upon emotional intelligence which relates to how we feel that the majority never even acknowledge.

We are told at various points how we are not to feel- but how are we supposed to feel?
And what do we do with those feelings that gnaw away and turn us into less than what we were meant to be. what are we supposed to do with those feelings we don’t want to feel? I don’t believe it was meant for us to go around feeling like we weren’t good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, rich enough whatever enough….. But these were the things we learned from a society that doesn’t want to communicate and build but rather a society that needs to tear something down to make an some other individual feel better. What happened to focusing on the subject at hand and dealing with it instead of sweeping it under the rug where it could grow into a monster.
What happened to agreeing to disagree- what happened to the idea of reciprocation? What happened to the idea: If you scratch my back I will scratch yours and everybody can be itch free.

I have helped many and i believe i was able to do so because I learned to help myself first. No one else seemed to be able to hear or wanted to hear what I was saying and therefore they couldn’t help me, but boy did they judge me for helping myself! I believe the ones who were the angriest were also feeling the guiltiest because they didn’t do anything to change the course of anything. Those who stand by and watch the crime occur while doing nothing are as guilty as the ones doing wrong in my opinion. They are approving the action by not defying it. Until our society realizes how they assist in the creation of the crime committed by the criminal we will not resolve our problems. We cannot do this until we learn how to feel. We can not do this until we become more compassionate and accepting of how others feel, and yet the idea of emotional education is very foreign to most of us. We rarely stop and consider how we feel unless something in our body actually hurts, if we were to learn to reflect upon how we feel I am thinking many of our physical as well as emotional and mental issues would automatically dissolve simply because as we started to hone in on how we felt we would also hone in on those lil things that build into big things and stop them before they became crises or monsters.

Inherited Rage Progress report 2012

Inherited Rage Progress report for 2012

2012 Inherited Rage became available to the general public via Amazon.com
Attention was drawn to inherited rage through blogs put out here and through
The pendulum foundation via Mary Ellen Johnson. Mentions were made by
Dan Daily in his blogs. Not much else was Done.
Inherited rage made approximately 500$ profit it’s first year on amazon.
300 dollars of that money was paid to the company hired to get it up on the net
The remaining 200 dollars has been sent and received by Dan daily to install a water pump on the property at Estrella vista. Dan holds open doors on his property for parricide kids to have a place to come home to once they are released from incarceration and are trying to find their place to live free of violence in a violent world- it is a difficult chore.

I am thrilled with the responses I have received from readers – only one in a year had a negative commentary- you can find that one one star review on amazon.com next to all the five star reviews. And for the record- all of those reviews are from different people -some I know, but more I don’t.
I wrote Inherited Rage with the intention that my story, as dreadful as it is, would help others
I know it is serving its purpose due to the readers response and I am thrilled that it has accumulated enough funds to make a difference for someone else.

If you have read Inherited Rage and have not, please post a review on Amazon – good or bad-
All are beneficial.
To my readers thank you for your support to help raise awareness on
The issues we all face with abuse in our society.

Below you will find a copy from Amazon reports for IR,

Sold
Borrowed
Royalty
Feb
2
4.08
March
7
1
16.46
April
18
1
39.2
May
13
8
44.58
June
13
44.72
July
17
58.48
August
15
51.6
September
24
96.8
October
20
125
November
11
68.75
December
2
12.5
January
7
43.75
February
7
43.75
March
15

?

171
649.67

For a period of 1 year, 171 copies of IR sold and collected 649.67 in royalties.

SWEAT EQUITY

Sweat Equity
By: Lone Heron
I threw the television out ages ago and my home became nstantaneously more pleasant and peaceful. However, I still have the Internet and when I look on there and allow the world and the events occurring in the realm of politics to enter my mindframe it makes me want to scream, turn off the machine and run for the hills.

All the woe is me – the argumentation-
The power plays and the struggles that keep people trapped in situations where they don’t want to be in is endless. The problem has not changed in nover two hundred years- probably not since the beginning of time when we were still the land of Pan. It is quite simple really, when you boil it all down it is the same enduring war between the haves and the have nots that has gone on from the beginning of time and will no doubtedly continue until this planet is no more.

Many of us tend to forget that our focus is fertilizer and whatever we focus on in life is what will grow. If we all keep our focus on positive things and get on with our chores things would work out with out all this crap- Half or more of the people I read about are the problem -they sit on their asses looking for a handout, looking for someone to save them when the only person that can save themselves is them. When we help ourselves, others want to help us- when we bash ourselves (mentally, verbally, emotionally or physical), others will also do this in the most amazing innocuous ways. Monkey see – Monkey do!

Many forget,’this country was built on more than anything else -‘courage, sweat equity and good old survival of the fittest. The fittest did not whine moan and groan,’they asked “what’s it gonna take?”, and put their backs into it. They took full and complete responsibility for themselves. They didn’t look for big brother or uncle sam, God Almighty, Jesus, Buddha or anyone else to bail them out.

No-they got up everyday and went out in horrid weather with no warm shower and no electricity to brew the coffee to start their day. They made make mention of the realities they faced but they did not complain. They pulled their bootstraps up and got their hands dirty getting on with the doing of things that needed to be done.

We should all do the same if for no other reason than to simply acknowledge and give thankful gratitude to our elders who paved the way for us to be here today with bootstraps to pull up.

All to many times I here people say “oh I don’t want to do that”. Well get over it life doesn’t get lived by keeping your hands clean and callous free. The rest of us who have pulled up our bootstraps don’t want to be your mama or your daddy! No we want you to get off your ass and join u’s to make a better world- not stand in line for a handout.

Everybody can do something to improve-
…..Find your something……
AND DO IT!

Lone Heron, Author of Inherited Rage can be found at amazon.com

Memory

Memory
By: lone Heron

Memory is really quite interesting- it is affected by so many different factors including diet, hydration, stress, hormones, emotions, trauma environment… I could go on for pages listing all the things that effect our brains including electronic devices, radio, tv, media, the pesky neighbor,
smells….
We forget about things and then remember we forgot-
We forgive trespasses and try to forget only to be trespassed again. We hit the pot hole at the end of the street even though it’s been there for years.

I became especially aware of my brain and memory after a horse accident in 2000. I sustained a head injury that left me with a nasty concussion. I slept for three and a half days. When I regained consciousness I was missing memory pieces- damage had been done I no longer had color vision
My vision was black and white. My language centers had been affected and I realized I couldn’t remember what the difference between to, two and too among other things. I was angry, angrier than I had ever been except one other time in my life. ( You can read about that other time in “Inherited Rage” available at amazon.com I saw red and was fighting mad. I was so mad I could taste blood. Yet there was none.

The brain has powers unrealized and accidents and injury can spur the brain into stimulating the body into unexpected action as can fear. Balancing the brain nutritionally is part of the recovery process required to move beyond events that create PTSD. Our government ignores this in both our soldiers and prisoners and thus don’t complete the project of recovery they begin. How do we change this? I suggest put them on farms where they can grow enough herbs and foods to facilitate their own healing as well as return some to the citizens who have been paying the bill for them for years.